Today’s pondering: is there anything more satisfying than a good “before and after?”

My oldest and I spent last Saturday pressure washing our back deck and I can’t stop staring at it. Not just the results, but the results as compared with the photos I took before we tackled this project. Honestly, the flood of dopamine I get as I scroll back and forth between the before and after photos is better than any antidepressant I’ve ever tried.

I’ve spent days trying to write about the metaphorical pressure washing I need in my own life – something strong enough (or gentle enough?) to remove the layers of a life I feel trapped beneath (with fingers crossed there’s still beauty to be revealed). But the words aren’t coming, so maybe I just needed to feel useful this weekend; to do something I could point to when it was finished and say, “I did that.”

Then it occurred to me: I can’t have an “after” if I don’t have a “before.”

There’s no satisfaction to be found cleaning something that’s already clean; no gratification in a life untouched by time and circumstance. I take my greatest pleasure in beauty that is created, uncovered, and made from items others might not look at twice. So, by that standard, my life is set to be the best before and after ever!